If all else fails, shit in your hand and eat it!

Wow.. Livingstone and Zambia, the place to be in 2011. We arrived in Livingstone, the playground of Africa, late in the afternoon with Fish leading the Windmill game as well as the greatest number of engine stalls (3)..clutch control master 5000. the first night was incredible with jollyboys backpackers providing us with a BED, yes a bed, for the night along with Impala stew. Rocking times, very very cool place to stay.

We woke up early faces ready and guns charged to face the mighty Zambezi...White water rafting here we come. "We wont flip will we Mr raft guide?" asked Jaco the tough general from vryheid....Enter rapid 16B (THE TERMINATOR) Carnage Carnage Extreme, no need for surf boards when a 7 man raft surfs a 10 meter deep hole for 1min with no-one wearing their brown jocks..."Jared?? Where is Jared Mr raft captain Awesome?" ... Myself and fish along with the other chaps on the raft, except Jared the "Long Swimmer", showed the tough general from vryheid as well as the experts how to rock a Grade 5 rapid on an upside down raft...FAIL 10000! ... Jared however took the scenic route choosing to swim the entire rapid as well as the next one, and when I say swim I mean take a ride in a washing machine. Nonetheless after a couple of bumps and bruises we emerged victorious thanks to the great river God "Nyami Nyami".

Later on we were off to our second shoe drop for Bobs for good at a small school just outside Livingstone. WOW - what an event, a truly once in a lifetime experience. We led (The Thunderhorse) the entire group of the Put Foot Rally in a 45min motorcade through Livingstone before arriving to a military brass band procession which escorted us towards the school nearby. It was UNREAL! (Photo's to follow soon) ...

And as usual the SillyBuggers did not disappoint with myself and fish in full school girl attire (7-8 yrs from PEP) and Jared as the thunderhorse Jockey, whip included, sexy guy. Sexy girls. Illegal...YES!

But it was seriously an event to remember...playing soccer with them on the sand soccer field for hours while the sun set in the background...truly Africa.

After setting up camp it was time to feast like kings again and drink free booze sponsored by Jareds ever faithful employers SAB!. The party now with three extra betties, Nicky Q, Mary Fish and Jasmine was INSANE and this time we managed to lead the charge from the first dance. We dont really remember too much of the night but a highlight was Fish insisting I light his blouse and he put it on flames and all...Lets just say the blouse was alight and so was Fishes hand. The night ended with me Nicky Q sleeping under a computer in the internet cafe with a chair as a blanket, only to be gracefully rescued by Mary, taken downstairs where we "Lie" to Jasmine and say "We just going back to camp quickly but we'll be back"...did we come back...NO, Did Jasmine walk home 3km at 4am quite cold amongst buffalo and elephants...YES! good times.

Drugs, dont do them... and above all when asked "Would you like some marijuana?" Do not answer "No thank you, I have some here!" ... Dont worry, this is not us, its our trusty comrades the Ranting antelopes of whom one was arrested for this exact event the next day. After a quick visit to the Vic falls...Its the wet season, we were soaked, Jared contemplated the bridge swing but realized he had holes in his pockets before leaving the party capital of Zambia and heading north towards Lusaka. "Hmmm that sign says Lake Kariba"..we all smiled and decided to take the 150km detour on the shittest road the Datsun had ever seen all to watch the sunrise over lake Kariba. the journey was epic with the highlights on shit road 500 including helping a land cruiser out of the sand which we made it through "HOORAH Thunderhorse" as well as a small discussion when i hit a rather large pothole which went along the lines "Hmmm sounds like our exhaust has holes in it now..." "Holes in our exhaust?? Never!" ... A sheared off exhaust pipe, Maybe!. The thunderhorse currently neighs like a V22000 TRACTOR! The sunrise was incredible as was the negotiated accommodation.

Next stop Lake Malawi...

PS - Entering the Put Foot Rally R12000, Buying the Thunderhorse R11000, Fuel to get to Zambia R4000... Not being able to draw money for food or fuel in Lusaka..PRICELESS, there are some things money cant buy, neither can Mastercard... For everything else use VISA!